i tore the sequins off your dress in your living room when i was bored
you didn’t notice you were focused on yourself and i was not important
as i strained beneath the weight of panicked months i couldn’t help
feeling distracted
i never told you but i always held my breath when you were lying on my chest
i wouldn’t dare move out of fear i’d wake you up
it didn’t matter if i slept
just a goose down surrogate
i asked you if you wanted me to stay the night and then you got undressed
the ceiling spun, “out of the vein” finished playing through
i sang it as you slept
for a moment i considered standing up and walking out to see if you reacted
so i suffered over night
cursed the covers every time
after all you were sleeping by yourself, mmhm
sleeping by yourself, mmhm
sleeping by yourself, mmhm
sleeping by yourself, mmhm
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